If you are going through menopause and angry with your husband or partner, help is available. Some women experience deep rage to the point of exploding at your partner. Therapy can help you understand and manage the intense emotions caused by the reduction in hormones during this phase of life.
Most women go through this phase when they are between 45 and 55 years of age. Menopause can happen before or after this period, as well. Menopause and anger often go together.
You are considered done with menopause when you have not had a period for one year. This means your ovaries have stopped releasing eggs and making most of the estrogen hormone.
Menopause And Angry With Your Husband
You might feel like your anger or rage is prominent for two weeks and then disappear for a month. This happens because your estrogen declines over time. So your estrogen-serotonin balance is thrown off with each period of decline.
Serotonin is a mood regulator that can also boost your happiness. Estrogen affects how much serotonin your body produces. During menopause, your estrogen levels go down, which can cause your emotions to feel off-balance.
Even minor issues with your partner can feel overwhelming. This can lead to frustration. It’s important to know that your emotions will stabilize as your body adjusts to the decrease in estrogen. Sometimes, menopause and rage can just take over.
Therapy To Help With Menopause And Rage
It’s so important for both partners to communicate openly during this time. That way, you can support each other and educate yourselves so you can understand the process. Seeking therapy can be so helpful as you go through this phase together. Empathy is so important.
Hormone changes can increase irritability and anxiety and cause depression. It’s important to look out for these symptoms.
Physical Symptoms Of Menopause
Women experience physical symptoms, as well. These symptoms often come with shame and embarrassment.
Some women try to hide these symptoms, since talking about menopause has been taboo in our society. That is why therapy can really help communication, increasing understanding and patience between partners.
Physical symptoms include hot flashes, night sweats, sleep disturbances, vaginal dryness, and decreased libido. These physical symptoms can be challenging to deal with on their own, let alone in combination with menopause and anger.
A New Phase Of Life And Everything My Husband Does Annoys Me
Directing anger towards your husband could be a sign of your frustration with menopause in general. You might be feeling that ‘everything my husband does annoys me’.
Menopause is a natural part of life, but it’s also a sign that you’re entering a new phase of life. A phase that, in our society, doesn’t bring with it any prestige. This can make menopause and anger a more likely pair.
When men get older, they are seen as distinguished or older gentleman. But when women get older, when you think about it, do you even know how they are seen? Maybe you can’t come up with anything because older women aren’t thought of at all.
Fear Of Becoming Invisible During And After Menopause
Sometimes you feel like you don’t get any respect, either. Many older women start to feel invisible or that you have to hide your menopause symptoms. Maybe you don’t even want to admit you are going through menopause to your husband or partner. If you aren’t talking about what you are going through, menopause and rage can get the best of you.
Women fear loosing their physical attractiveness. Our society sees this as a huge part of female identity. Women’s value is seen only through her sex appeal. So the anger you are directing to your partner might be related to all the things about menopause that you can’t control.
Negative Stereotypes About Menopause And Anger
Discrimination in the workplace for women going through menopause makes it difficult for you to call attention to your symptoms. Many women feel that fatigue, memory problems and anxiety get in the way of their careers. At work, menopause can have a significant impact.
Negative stereotypes about menopause and anger are deeply embedded. You don’t want to be typecast as emotionally unstable and unable to perform at work. This unwanted stigma could make it impossible for you to feel like you can take time off or talk to anyone about how you’re feeling.
At home, this can cause you to feel angry, resentful and misunderstood. Your husband or partner might be the only one you can be angry with. You might feel that he is the only one you can express your frustration with. He might not understand, thinking ‘why is my wife always mad at me’.
Women often feel they have to overcompensate in life and at work. There is so much pressure to act like everything is fine. This means ignoring sometimes debilitating symptoms, leading to a lot of stress and burnout.
Stress can worsen symptoms, such as hot flashes. It’s no wonder you might take things out on your partner! If you are going through menopause and angry with your husband or partner, therapy can help you navigate through the difficult phase of life.
Therapy Helps Process This Complicated Life Transition Of Menopause And Angry With Your Husband
Symptoms such as heart palpitations, night sweats, insomnia and anxiety really disrupt your life. Your mood might tend towards increased anger and less towards sadness. As these emotions come to the surface, it can really effect your relationship.
In our society, women are accepted if they are sad, but not angry. Men are expected to be angry, but not sad. Women are called bitches if they are angry. Many women have learned not to show their anger. Angry men are seen as strong and confident go-geters.
During menopause, it might be very difficult to hold back anger, especially if it has been building up over many years.
Your partner and you might have been avoiding dealing with some important issues. Menopause can bring things to the forefront, making them impossible to ignore. Therapy during this time can really help.
Sex During Menopause And Angry With Your Husband
Research has shown that 50% of women have low sexual desire during menopause. Vaginal dryness and pain during intercourse are also common. On top of it all, lower testosterone levels impact libido. This is a very frustrating situation. It’s no wonder menopause and anger are connected.
Your interest in sex can really go down. It might be much harder to orgasm. This really impacts your feelings and communication with your partner. It might be difficult to turn your partner down when he/she wants to get romantic. So, you might turn to getting mad to push him away. This is where therapy can really help.
What Can I Do When My Wife Is Always Mad At Me
Your wife might want intimacy without the pressure of sex. Ask her and listen to what she needs. Therapy can facilitate this. She might want loving touch without the pressure to make love. A non-threatening massage can go a long way towards closeness and connection.
Quality time together is important. So, make time for each other. Brainstorm to come up with new ideas. Perhaps there are things you’ve long longed to do. This can take the pressure off of menopause and angry with your husband.
Loss of Control
There are many solutions to the physical symptoms. For example, lubricants, moisturizers and supplements can help and make you feel more empowered. Dr. Christiane Northrup https://amatalife.com/pages/dr-northrup specializes in helping women with the physical symptoms of menopause.
Treating these symptoms help you feel more in control of your body. This can help lower your anxiety and stress and improve your mood. It takes the edge off going through menopause and angry at your husband.
Therapy can help you feel more in control of your life. Partners can make a huge difference by being extra generous with their love, attention, understanding and forgiveness right now. Since there is so much in life we have no control over, working on your communication and closeness in therapy makes a big difference.
Neurofeedback is an excellent therapy for improving resilience, anxiety and depression. It will calm down your nervous system, which will improve physical symptoms. When you are calm, you can better manage the stress and changes that menopause brings. Neurofeedback can help when you are going through menopause and angry with your husband or partner. It helps with the emotional reactivity.
If you’d like to talk about menopause and anger or rage, I’m here to help. I have offices in two locations, Torrance and Santa Monica. Please feel free to reach out by phone 310-314-6933 or email mindy@mftherapy.com.
